3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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