wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I feel like death gave me a hand job
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Randomize