his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
