I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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