Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
Randomize
