even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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