Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
