All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize