I'd wear matching sweaters with you
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize
