I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
