I just made out with a guy for $7.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
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