420 ftw
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
