Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
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