Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
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