how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
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