No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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