My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize
