At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize
