Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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