im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize