You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Randomize
