I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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