I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize