i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
