Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
