Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
