All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Randomize
