I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
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