who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
there's paper in my vomit.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
