Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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