Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
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