I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
she looked like the before picture.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize