I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Randomize
