Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
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