I want to stick my p in your. b.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Randomize
