There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Randomize
