just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
