Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
How does it feel to date your dad?
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize