Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
