Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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