your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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