I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Randomize
