if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I'm experimenting with sincerity
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Randomize
