It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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