Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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