no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Randomize
