By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Randomize