I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
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