you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
