I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
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