i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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