Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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